Personality Type

INFJ

"Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow." ~ Swedish Proverb

"Think lightly of yourself and deeply of the world." ~ Miyamoto Musashi

"At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want." ~ Lao Tzu

"You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty." ~ Mahatma Ghandi

"Consider your origins; you were not meant to live as brutes, but to follow virtue and knowledge." ~ Dante Alighieri

INFJ - Idealist

Overview of The Idealist Style

  • I – Introvert (inward) Focus
  • N – Intuitive Framing
  • F – Feeling Response
  • J – Judging Approach
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Soft-spoken yet determined, Idealists work hard for what they believe in. As feelers, they have a strong people-focus, and with their intuitive framing, they often see a better world for all. Helping others is their main motivation. Idealists believe in equality and fairness for everyone and have a keen sense of conviction. They are not dreamers, though. With their judging approach, they will work tirelessly for a cause they believe in.

Idealists are warm and open and connect with others easily, though being introverts they are not overly demonstrative. They seek out others who share their passions. Idealists believe that everyone can be convinced to see a better world as they themselves do. Idealists are patient communicators.

Idealists are often so focused on others, that they may forget to take care of themselves. Their convictions are strong and they will diligently work toward realizing their ideals. Martin Luther King, Jr. was an Idealist, as was Mother Teresa.

Communicating with The Idealist

Unless you know the Idealist well, do not begin with an overly familiar conversation. Idealists will see overly personal conversation as an invasion of their personal space if it is the beginning of a conversation. It is important to get to know him or her before asking about family or personal details.

Idealists will respond well to discussions of conceptual ideas, particularly those that put the well-being of people front and center. Logic and facts should be used as support for an overall idea. Strictly factual conversations will leave the Idealist feeling as though the other person doesn’t “get it.” Facts that support the larger idea sell the Idealist on the idea first then present logic to support it. Capture their hearts and minds first.

Conflict

Idealists prefer to avoid conflict. They prefer harmony over conflict. When there is conflict, it is best to allow the Idealists alone time to reflect on what has been discussed, then reconvene to resolve the conflict. When discussing a conflict with an Idealist, it is best to open the conversation with your positive intent to improve the relationship.

Relationships

Idealists will connect deeply with only a few people. Idealists are great listeners, yet will not readily share much about themselves until they are comfortable in a relationship. Idealists will work to establish common ground in new relationships, comparing views and passions until they find something they can agree on. Idealists often “shut down” with people that are overly aggressive about pursuing paths the Idealist perceives as causing possible harm to others, for example, an organizational change that requires a lay off.

Strengths

  • Insightful – As great listeners, Idealists will listen for motives and see through dishonest or aggressive tactics. They can see how events and people are connected and look for solutions that cause the least harm.

  • Determined and diligent – Idealists hold strong ideals; it can be dissuade them from sticking with a passion or interest they believe in deeply. They’ll work hard for a cause they believe in.

  • CompassionateIdealists see the best in people and truly want everyone to get along. They will sacrifice their time, energy and resources to help others.

Challenges

  • Too idealistic – Idealists can become burned out when working tirelessly for a cause they believe in. They will often work well past the time that others have recognized a “lost” cause.

  • Overly sensitive – Idealists are private people, and their values define who they are. Questioning an Idealist’s motives will cause angst and they can shut down in a conversation where they feel attacked or mistrusted.

  • Perfectionist – Idealists work tirelessly for what they believe, which can lead to them working hard for perfection, an ideal state that they passionately believe can be reached.

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